Hey Guys! So this week all I can think about is the fact that I'm going on on vacation on Friday! Woo hoo! Junes and Brian and I are going to Los Angeles, where they'll be visiting some friends and I have some business meetings set up, and then we'll be heading up to the Oregon coast to visit family. I can't wait, it has been too long since this mule has had a vacation! Since all I can do is think about my trip, here's a little slide show of things I'm looking forward to seeing in LA and Oregon.
Hey Everyone! Since I started doing this blog, I've gotten a lot of people asking me questions or wanting to know my opinion on things. Maybe because I'm blogging people think I have something to say about everything? Well, guess what? I do! If you ask me a question I'm gonna answer it. I've already gotten so many e-mails just in the few weeks that I've been doing this blog that I decided to introduce a new feature:
Hey Apples, what do you think of Anthony Weiner's current attempt to get back into public office? -Brad Serpentine
Dear Mr. Serpentine,
First of all, congratulations on having an extremely cool name! Are you currently in or have you thought about getting into pornos? If so, say hi to Mr. Weiner for me, because to answer your question, that's where I think he belongs! I don't normally care what people do with their free time, including people in the public eye, but in this case, it seems like Mr. Weiner's "talents" are better suited for a different profession than that which he currently seeks - namely one that is based in the San Fernando Valley. Hahahaha! Now don't jump to any conclusions about me, I wasn't involved in the texting and I haven't seen the photos, all I'm saying is that anyone so keen on "letting it all hang out" should get paid to do so. Besides, his last name is WEINER! You can't invent that!
Dear Apples,
I saw your height on your resume and I don't think you're really 1'9", you look shorter. I know a lot of Hollywood actors fudge their stats, do you do it too?
Sincerely, Jennifer Springfield
Dear Jen,
I can call you Jen, right? Based on your personal remark it seems like we've met. Wait, we haven't met? Then how the heck do you get off presuming to know how tall I am? I mean really! Sorry for the snark Jen, I guess I'm a little touchy about my height. Not because I'm self conscious, but because I'm proud of all twenty-one of my inches and wouldn't dream of lying about them! So to answer your question, no, I don't "fudge my stats," but thanks so much for asking. Now if you'll just tell me what brand underwear you wear we can call it even! Hahahahaha!
Hi everyone, just a quick mid-week post to bring you another addition of "Where's Apples?" The photo below is a typical subway station in New York and I'm somewhere in the crowd. You can click on the photo to make it larger, which you'll probably need to do because I'm harder to find this time. Good luck!
Hey Guys! Have you seen the commercials for that new movie "The Conjuring?" I saw it the other night and boy is it scary! It's about a family that gets terrorized by a supernatural presence in the spooky old house they move into. The building that I live in was built in 1908, so it got me thinking that my best friend Junes and her boyfriend Brian and I might not be the only ones living here. Yikes! I don't wanna wake up in the middle of the night with a psychotic ghost witch floating over me and screaming like a banshee, (or worse!) so I decided to take matters into my own hooves and cleanse our living space. Take a look at how it went:
To quote Tangina from another great scary movie, "Poltergeist": "This house is clean." I just gotta make sure to tie my gypsy scarf on tighter next time! Hahahaha! Have a great week!
Hey Everyone, I don't know where you're reading from but chances are it is hot! Here in New York City we're melting like a stick of butter in a hot skillet. Today I wanted to do a video blog for you all and talk about what's been going on in my life, but as you'll see I found it difficult to function in the heat. Watch below to see what happened:
I stayed in that freezer for 20 minutes and let me tell you, it felt amazing! I'm lucky that I fit in there, but I know that most of my readers probably aren't so lucky so here's a little slide show for you of things that'll help you think cool thoughts. Enjoy!
Hi guys, I know I'm usually pretty positive, but today I have to gripe a little bit. A couple months ago I was up for a job that I really hoped I'd get - to be the face of "Hairvitalize" brand horse shampoo. It's this awesome shampoo that people use to make their horse's mane and tail extra shiny. I use it all the time and get tons of compliments. I had a good feeling when I went to the audition, but then I never heard anything. Well, I was at the Walgreens the other day and as I passed through the shampoo aisle THIS caught my eye:
Um, EXCUSE ME?? I know that in a previous post I said that I have benefited from open minded casting directors who let me audition for roles written for humans, so of course it should go the other way too, but come on! That lady booked the job instead of me? Sure, I'm not a horse but I'm a heck of a lot closer than she is! Oh well, it's a tough profession that I've chosen and there's a lot of rejection. All you can do is pick yourself up, brush yourself off, and photoshop yourself into the ad so you can see what it would look like if you'd have booked it instead of her. And lucky for you all, I did just that! Have a great week!
Oh my God, what a busy week I have had! I've been running around like a crazy mule and this is the first chance I'm getting to write a blog post. Last night I got to do one of my favorite summer activities here in Brooklyn, which is watching a movie outside in Brooklyn Bridge Park with the view of the Manhattan skyline behind the screen. The above photo is the view from the lawn. Pretty spectacular, huh? Last night the movie was "Ferris Bueller's Day Off," which I thoroughly enjoyed. After my busy week it also got me thinking about taking a day off myself, so I put together a few photos of what it might look like if I took a day off and did awesome things like what Ferris did in the movie. Here's "Apples Minsprod's Day Off!"
First I'd go to the Metropolitan Museum and soak up some amazing art......
Of course I'd be cruisin' around in my 1961 Ferrari 250 GT California Spyder just like Ferris did in the movie.....
Then it's time for High Tea at The Plaza. Mmmmm, so many pastries, so little time!
And what better to end my day than with a Yankee game? I got a great seat, didn't I? I could almost reach out and grab Derek Jeter's toosh! Hahahaha! Well, even though it was all pretend I'm simply exhausted so that's it for now. Have a great weekend everyone, here's to taking a day off!
Hi everyone! Did you have a good 4th of July weekend? I did for sure and I've got the tan to show for it. Now it's Monday though so back to business. I realized looking over some recent posts that I have a lot of photos of shirtless men. Nothing wrong with that, but I don't want this blog to become like a male version of Penthouse so today I'm going to showcase my serious actor side. I have an audition coming up for a Shakespeare play and I'd like to perform for you the monologue that I'll be using. So without further adieu, may I present to you my monologue from "A Midsummer Night's Dream."
What a perfect monologue, huh? It's almost like The Bard wrote it just for me! I've definitely been known to scratch some eyes out here and there but of course they always deserved it! Hahahahahaha! Have a great week everyone!
Hey everyone, just a quick post to wish you a Most Happiest 4th of July! I'll be heading to the beach today with some friends, and in that spirit I made a little game for you, my readers. You remember Where's Waldo? Well, below you'll find Where's Apples?. Try & find me in the crowded beach! I had some much fun making this in photoshop, I think I might make Where's Apples? a regular series in my blog posts! Anyway, Happy America Day & catch y'all later!
Well hello everyone! I'd like to take a second and get political and say how happy I am with the Supreme Court's decision last week about gay marriage. I have many gay friends and am thrilled that now they're able to get married. If you know anything about me, you know I love to party, and I can't wait to party my butt off at all these fabulous weddings I'm going to attend! This past Sunday was the gay pride parade here in New York and anyone that has been to it can attest that it is one of the MOST fantastic around! I wrote a blog post a few days ago about requiring men to get a license in order to go shirtless, but let me tell you, the guys I saw on Sunday wouldn't have any trouble getting their license. Here are a few examples:
Hubba hubba, am I right? To bad they're not interested in little old me...... Hahahahahaha!